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Perform we must

I remember moments when I have said something funny, when I have genuinely entertained, or when I have said something enlightening, though I remember that with less fondness.  But I remember before these moments there was such struggle.  Extended periods of turning myself inside out and vomitting embarrassment all about my person to get to the point where I thought I was appreciated rather than tolerated.  One solution is to not care, and I can not care about the embarrassment or not care about the tolerance.  I shall not close down, for perform we must.

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